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Writer's pictureChelsea Page

How to Apologize/How to Forgive

Updated: Oct 19, 2021

Rev. Amelia Dress provides a step-by-step guide in The Hopeful Family

How to apologize (pg. 42):

  • Express regret ("I'm sorry") but don't stop there...

  • Say what you did and why it was wrong (kids may need help seeing the impact and feelings of the other person)

  • Adults - you don't need to explain or justify why you did it ("stop talking before you want to")

  • Offer a way to fix it, make it right, or make it different next time (kids may need help finding ideas for repair)

How to respond to an apology (pg. 44):

  • Thank you for your apology.

  • I hear your apology.

  • I appreciate your apology/that means a lot to me.

  • I accept your apology.

  • I forgive you.

  • We can make it right together/we can work it out.

  • Don't just say "It's okay," because usually it's not okay.

How to forgive (pg. 46):

  • Remember a time you needed forgiveness and how good it felt to be forgiven.

  • Tell the story of the hurt.

  • Try to release your hurt feelings.

  • Try to wish well on the other person.

  • This can take time!

For more explanation in depth and examples for each of these practices, buy Rev. Amelia's book The Hopeful Family: Raising Resilient Children in Uncertain Times here.


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Contact Pastor Chelsea: associatepastor@holladayucc.org

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